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A True Gentleman

Greetings Golfers,

We all admire a good golf swing when we see it. It’s even more impressive in person than on television. What really stands out is that it’s strong and purposeful … and yet graceful at the same time.

It’s the same when encountering a really special person – they have those same qualities. We are graced with such a person at DRGC. I’m not going to say his name – he would be embarrassed. He blows my mind every time I see him … just like when I see a great golf swing.

This fellow is 90 years old. And his “golf swing” is still amazing. He’s played here for at least 20 years … and the consistency to his “swing” is unbelievable … this is not a con man.

Why am I so enamored? Because of his manners. They are the real deal. Not just some affectation … but, they come from his heart and soul.

Here’s just a minor example … but it speaks volumes. The other day he needed an extra glove because his right hand was cold. He’s a right-handed player and thus wears a left-handed glove … this was just for warmth on his other hand.

Our stock of right-handed gloves is pretty slim – we’re not Dick’s Sporting Goods. Though our staff tried to find him a glove that fit … we didn’t have what he needed. Instead of getting angry … he was thankful for the attempt to find the right glove. Sincerely thankful. Our staff was busy with our customers and phones ringing … he was aware of the situation … and appreciative – not angry.

There is a mindset that everything has to be perfect … and if it isn’t … a temper tantrum is in order. Sort of like a spoiled child who throws a fit if his sandwich isn’t served immediately … or if the crusts weren’t perfectly removed.

If the parent apologizes to the child – instead of reprimanding the bad behavior … a rude, demanding narcissist may be created.

Here’s a thought:  Maybe the parent thrives-on this insanity. Maybe the parent feels bad/guilty because their household isn’t perfect. They believe that the only reason the child would misbehave … is because the parent had failed in providing the perfect environment. This is actually narcissism … not kindness. Real kindness would not allow this terrible behavior. People need to learn to be responsible for their behavior. Narcissists love building Utopia to control people – not out of love.

Ok … back to our hero. He does what he does for THE RIGHT REASON. That is always his motivation. If the environment isn’t perfect … he doesn’t have a tantrum … he handles it with grace. Not weakness … not at all … I’m talking grace.

Mistakes happen. Things aren’t perfect. I’m not defending bad environments. But life isn’t perfect … we don’t live in Utopia … that isn’t a license to be rude.

We all know the difference between intentional and not. An employee who intentionally gives bad service deserves to be reprimanded. However, because a business isn’t perfect … the customer doesn’t have the right to have a tantrum. Or, if a customer starts demanding special service or breaking the rules … they need to be called-out.

Obviously, a business has to be realistic too. It’s unfair to expect customers to be perfect. At DRGC, we expect “C” level behavior. We love “B” level, but don’t expect it. Yet, we won’t tolerate “D” or “F” behavior.

Fortunately, our 90 year hero constantly demonstrates “A” level behavior.

He’s the best “player” at DRGC.


Tom Abts
GM/Head PGA Professional
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Deer Run Golf Club
8661 Deer Run Drive
Victoria, MN 55386
(952) 443-2351

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